I am a cynic. I do not believe in Love at First Sight or in Happily Ever After. I seldom watch romantic movies and while I do read romance novels, most of the time I skip over the mushy stuff to get to the good parts. All that being said, I do believe in Love. Real Love, True Love. As I sit and write this, my eyes stray toward the window and my ears listen for the sound of his car even though I know it will be hours before he will be home. He is not Prince Charming, or my knight in shining armor; he is my husband. Today is our twentieth anniversary.
Gone are the deep sighs of longing. Forgotten is the pitter-pat of a smitten heart. What is left is the deep contentment of true acceptance and completeness. For Better or Worse, Richer or Poorer. those were the promises we made to each other so many years ago. We have had more ‘worse’ than ‘better’ and a whole lot more ‘poorer’ than ‘richer’ but through it all, we have had each other. It has not been easy. Money is always tight and we don’t always agree on things. Sometimes he gets cranky and I get frazzled. We both struggle with depression. Sometime we even wonder ‘What If?’
What if I had said ‘no’ when he asked? What if I had gone after that boy that I really liked in high school, or the man in college? What if he had chosen a girl who was prettier or smarter or a better housewife? What if?
We can never know what might have been. We can only make the most of what we have today. Today, I am married to a man who completes me and challenges me to be better than I ever thought possible. Today, I will welcome home my best friend and lover with a kiss of true love. Would I have had these things with someone else? Maybe, maybe not. For today I am content. I am still in love. I eagerly await the man who loves me. He is the hero of my own love story. Not the handsomest, not the most ambitious or wealthy, but he is my true hero who rescues me from myself by seeing me as more than I am. For him I keep trying to be better, if only because he never asks me to. He loves me as I am while still seeing all that I could be. Who needs more romance than that?
Yes, the fluffy type romance is over, but the real Romance, the kind that sinks deep into the soul and grows richer and stronger everyday, is here to stay.
I love you , Tim. Happy Anniversary.